Easier Said Than Done

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Things I've Realised...

…I cannot keep blaming changing room mirrors, clothes that seem to shrink in the washing machine, bad genes and random skinny bitches for the fact that I’m overweight. At some point I need to put down the cheese and admit that I don’t work out enough or eat right. It’s taken scary photos at bad angles and skinny jeans bursting at the seams to make me realize that I need to re-think my habits. Any suggestions on how to motivate myself would be gladly appreciated.

…I’m getting closer to a happier work life. I could even say I was on my way to starting my desired career. Things are changing slowly and at times they barely move but they’re looking up. I have some very exciting things to look forward to and hopefully one day I can say “I love what I do!”

…I need a financial adviser. Every month I swear I’m gonna stick to my budget and save more money. Come the middle of the month and I have to do some stealing, um shopping at my parent’s place, restrict the social gatherings and go without new pretty things in my wardrobe. What’s even worse when I panic about not having enough money I tend to spend more. In my mind, spending calms me down and makes it all okay.

…I will definitely be making new year’s resolutions next year. I plan to stop being late for everything and instead be 5 minutes early. Except for fashion events, for those I’ll be a little bit late, tis the fashionable thing to do! I also resolve to be one of those annoyingly happy people. My optimism will be so great, you’d think it can cure cancer. Hopefully it will also be contagious and make a difference and all that nonsense :)

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Summer Loving

The weather in Cape Town has been funny lately. On Saturday we had that fabulous sunny day where we could all wear dresses, drink wine in the sun and wear sunnies. On Sunday I also wore a dress, with a cardi but still the weather was pleasant. Since Monday however, it has been nipples cold and we’re all forced to wear dozens of layers. As I cannot do anything but dream of summer, I thought I’d better start preparing for it. This is when all the overseas fashion websites are tres helpful as they are coming out of summer and we’re going into it. Lots of summer outfit inspiration. I’ve been viewing Polyvore like it’s my job.

Here’s what I’ve come up with:

After Sunset Cocktails

I am in love with this purple Marchesa dress I found on Net-A-Porter. I would rock it with champagne pink peep-toes, black corsage on my hand, dark, smokey eye make-up and a cosmopolitan.

City Strolling

Considering I now live in the hipster hood of Kloof Street, I have to keep up with the cool kids. This cool yet stylish ensemble is how I'm going to do it. The dress and shoes are all me, and the fedora is just a touch of hip. The Chanel sunnies are of course out of reach but they would bring a touch of class to the look.

Working 9-5

I work in an office that's very casual. People can wear outfits two days in a row and walk around sans shoes. I am not one of those people. Because I always dress for the job I want rather than the one I have, I make an effort. This look is so effortlessly chic. The blue Louboutins are of course a rather large pipe dream but they are just fabulous.

Now all I need is the moolah to go shopping.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

I Got A Feeling...

Yesterday I got this weird feeling that no matter what was happening now, there are good things on the horizon. I don’t want to sound like a weirdo or like I’m going to invite you to join a cult but I felt really excited and happy at the prospect of the future. I’m not sure if it’s got to do with me moving forward career-wise, my love life taking off (which would be fantastic) or even something silly and superficial like a nice hair day (it’s insanely frizzy today). But I’m in a good place. I hope everyone has something to look forward to. I don’t want to be the only one feeling this good.

Happy Wednesday bitches!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

You Learn You Live

Things I need to do...

Learn to keep my emotions in check. For some reason I can break into tears really easily. I am not particularly sensitive but I don’t like anyone attacking me. Say something about my weight, the fact I’m a pushover or that my dream career is slipping further and further away and I’ll look like a panda from crying. I need to control this. Not only because I haven’t found a good waterproof mascara yet. But also ‘cause no one likes a crybaby. And I want to be one of those strong women who doesn’t back down. I want to be the type of women Maya Angelou was talking about (And still I rise!). I’m going to start by listening to Madonna’s You’ll See while I work out. It’s one of those songs that motivates you to show everyone who told you cannot do something that one day you’ll be great.

Learn to save money. Do you have any idea how embarrassing it is to have to go and withdraw R50. It’s even worse when the machine you’re at only gives out hundreds. I shouldn’t have to live like this, particularly when I’m not a student anymore. The days of withdrawing everything in my account and leaving a measly R2.50 should be over. I do admit I have a spending problem. And a weird one at that. I tend to spend all my savings on fancy coffees during the week and sweets when I put in petrol. By the middle of the month, I cannot go out because I spent my entertainment budget on jellybeans and Fair Trade lattes. The next month is going to be a bit of a challenge. It’s the big move, there are four birthdays, Smokey Eyes comes for a visit and it’s Fashion Week. Chances I’ll have that R50 to withdraw at the end are slim. So starting in September because realistically August will be a bit of a money abortion, I’m going to start saving again. Also no more fuel-time sweets. And only lattes twice a week. I have an addiction so go slowly is how it’s going to happen.

Learn to try more. I have a huge fear of rejection so I do not try hard enough. Sometimes not at all. I’m not shy and I have faith yet nothing kills the soul like someone saying no. I’m one of those people who need validation in life, someone who needs a well done after a job. So if I do something and someone has something negative to say, I’m crushed. I wish I didn’t view failure the way I do. I wish I could throw caution to the wind and follow every whim I had. I might have my dream career, a boyfriend and complete happiness. This is one is going to be a lot harder than say not crying or saving money. I’ll definitely need a lot more Madonna songs to get to that point. But I think I may be willing to change soon enough because the only thing worse than rejection is regret.

Anything you guys need to learn?

It’s almost the weekend.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

It's Friday! I'm in Love (with lots of guys)!

Friday. As there ever been a better word said to a person who is continually bored at work and wasting away her talent. By talent, I mean being Queen of the World.

Whilst I've been answering phones, booking lunches I'm not invited to and organizing board meetings the world has been mismanaged.

One nice thing about my job, the internet. At the moment we have no restrictions which means I can listen to Youtube whilst I type out letters. I can read stress-management blogs while my desk neighbour irritates the crap out of me and I can browse gossip sites. For me, this is the reason the internet was invented.

And this week, I have fallen in love. If we were counting my celeb crush total and the number of times I have fallen in "love", I would be a virtual crush slut.

These are the hot men I have been salivating over this week:


Mark Ronson is an old favourite. I'm a huge fan of geek chic and I think he personifies it well. One of his little sister is a designer. The other dates Lindsay Lohan. If there was a burning building and he could only save one of his sisters, I know which one I'd vouch for. Luckily is family hasn't come between us yet.


Ed Westwick. Ah, Chuck Bass. I don't think I need to go on. But in case you still haven't been convinced, here he is at the Glamour magazine awards in London earlier than week. Tanned, stubbly and utterly jumpable.


The last thing I'm in love with is not a guy. More than two crushes a week is even enough for me. It's this fabulous primer from Mac. It's called Prep + Prime and retails for R250.00. I haven't bought my own yet. I'm saving my money for the big move. But I have tried it out and it's amazing. It makes your skin feel silky soft and foundation just glides on. No more blotchy patches.

To end this Friday off, here's one of my all-time favorite songs. It calls for singing horribly off-key at the top of your lungs.

Enjoy!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Working 9 to 5

There’s this Chris Rock comedy special where he explains the difference between people who have careers and people who have jobs. He colourfully states that people with careers make the people with jobs feel awful and should just shut the hell up about their working bliss. Unfortunately I fall into the latter category. I have a job. Not a career I wake up early for. Not a career I don’t mind working later for. And not a career I can snootily parade in front of others to make them feel bad. Btw, my dream career would be a features writer at a magazine. A little like The Devil wears Prada.

Sadly I got side-tracked in my third year of studies and opted for an easy way to feed my clothes and shoe addiction rather than trying to find something that even resembled what I remotely studied. My first real job, retail experience aside, was as a receptionist in a wellness centre. That’s a fancy term for a beauty spa. I have to admit that I was great at this job. I’m not being an arrogant bitch. It’s the truth; mostly because it’s wasn’t a hard job. I found the application of a little teeth and tits around clients worked wonders. If you can handle demanding consumers, deal with kids in the waiting area and advise on overly expensive face creams that rid the skin of acne, you would also be a receptionist supremeo. Unfortunately after too many beauty therapists bitching at each other, an unmotivating manager and seriously low wages, I left.

This was not a problem because I had another job lined up. I was actually going to be working at a magazine. My dream job. Then budget cuts struck. I was unceremoniously fired before I’d even signed a contract. In a moment of haste, I took the first job that came my way. Anything other than being a receptionist. And what did I end up being…a receptionist. Not to start off with. I’d originally just filled a position left by the Hot Mama who was on maternity leave. It was admin, it was easy and I was making a lot more. Months went by, they renewed my contract and all of a sudden I noticed a change. Their original receptionist wasn’t the brightest crayon in the box. I thought she was sweet if a little special. Then with my admin and previous front of house experience, I was offered her job. And a pay increase. I shamelessly took my new position. After all, my new winter clothes were not going to pay for themselves. It’s almost been a year since that happened and now I still work in the same job doing the same thing I tried to leave all those months ago.

And now it’s really beginning to get to me. It’s not that I loathe the job or the company. It’s a great company; there are loads of perks plus I love the people I work with. There’s Hot Mama who is now preggers with her second child; the Social Butterfly who’s got a fabulous life I envy; Mr Uppity who is proud with no apologies (I love his comments about our less-than fabulous coworkers); and then there’s my boss, the Navy Seal. These are all people I’d really miss if I left. But if I don’t leave it’ll be like settling for Mickey Rourke when I could have Hugh Jackman. After all, when you’re an office administrator how much further can you go.

Those are just some of the bad things…the other thing that really makes me want to leave are some of the not-so-cool coworkers I have to deal with. I’m talking about the touchy-feely guy who stands behind me and watches what I do on my computer without any dignity. I can be doing my banking, checking out facebook or updating the company website and suddenly he’s there behind me. Having a look at my depleted savings fund or watching me tag my weekend pictures. Things are not helped by the fact that he resembles Eric Cartman. I swear if he wears a beanie in winter and zip-up top, I’ll wet myself.

Then there’s the guy dubbed Creepazoid. He is the sole reason I believe my death will occur during working hours at my place of business. He’s not a just a starer, but a super-starer. I can be on the other side of the office and I can feel his beady–eyes on me. I can be eating my breakfast at my desk and I can sense he’s watching me. I can be sharing a joke with my besties and he’s there, smiling along like he’s a part of the freakin’ group. It’s moments like these that I’m convinced he has the entire office bugged and when we think he’s listening to his Ipod, he’s merely making moves to distinguish where his next victim lives. At times I think I’m just being a bitch; that’s when I try and make an effort. Turns out I’m not a bitch, he’s just a weirdo. He’s tall, almost 30 and still dresses like a wannabe Eminem – doesn’t he know that sad, white boy rappers went out of style ages ago. He has no social skills and scares the bejesus out of me.

And I have to deal with him. Just like I have to deal with Cartman and his space issues (which he apparently doesn’t have). Just like I have to deal with answering phones, taking messages and ordering office supplies.

It’s called paying your dues. And when I’m done – is that a sunset I see in the horizon – I know I’ll be happy.

Now if only I didn’t have to bring a can of mace to work.

Ex-oh! Ex-oh!