Dear Future Boyfriend, Part Five

Dear Future Boyfriend



You get different types of people. You get the kind who are spontaneous and do things on weekends. Things which require them to actually leave the comfort of the couch and experience things. Then you get the people who relish in the comfort of the couch. I would like to think that I am in the middle. It’s more truthful to say that I am ¾ of the way on the couch and the other quarter is desperate to be out there. Therefore FB I need you to be one of those people. The active kind of person that makes lazy people hate them. It’s sort of like the skinny girl who says things like “Sometimes I forget to eat.” Anyway I need you to encourage me to visit places other than a food market and to do spontaneous active things like take advantage of a nice day by going hiking or to the beach. You see I want to do all those things but somewhere between the Parks & Recreation marathon and that bag of salt and vinegar chips that will not eat itself I get lazy.

In my mind, I am pretty gangsta. Seriously I think my knowing all the words to Funky Cold Medina and having watched Dangerous Minds a gazillion times equals thug life. And I’m going to need you to go along with it. So when I quote rap lyrics without knowing what the hell they’re talking about and start describing things as ‘dope’ ‘crunk’ and ‘bling’ remember why you love me and ignore it.

It seems there are various ways to discern someone’s personality whether it be their reaction to animals or the way they sleep or the music they listen to. I like to do it by seeing how you treat waiters. There are many things I think I could excel at:
Dancer in a music video - yes
Ice-cream taster - yes
Chuck Bass’ girlfriend oh hell yes!
One of the things I would suck at is being a waiter. And it’s not something I would ever deign to do. Therefore I treat most servers with an unprecedented amount of respect and tips. Also I’ve read Kitchen Confidential and I really don’t want anyone to mishandle my food. If we experience horrible service, you have every right to bring it up. But if you think being mean to waiters is something that makes you appear macho and sexy, oh boy do you have no idea how fast those knickers are coming up.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Image from here.

Trying to be Positive

So yesterday was officially renamed The Day From Hell. So many bad things happened and I was on the verge of tears too many times.

I don't want to relive any of it, so instead of wallowing in self-pity - which I did for most of the evening yesterday, by the way depressed does not go well with a wrap dress - I have decided to remain positive. Especially since after all my shit went down, I saw someone who clearly had real problems. That put mine into perspective.

So I did what any skinny bitch would do, I put on my big girl pants, extra mascara and some high, high heels and I'm dealing with it. Actually that's a lie, my pants are not that big ;).

So in order to be happy I'm going to list some things that make me happy. Please feel free to add to the list. Have a great Thursday!

Lattes from Vida



Chuck Bass


Lady Gaga's The Fame Monster


Glee



Henry Cavil

Roland Mouret's Galaxy Dress

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Things That I ♥ and Things That Bug Me - The Little Things Edition

Things That I ♥:

At the moment, nothing can beat a slice of crispy toast with a smooth layer of peanut butter and a latte for lunch. Munching on this while reading a Marian Keyes book is heaven. And a great way to relax when work is hard to handle.

Gossip Girl season three. Oh how I’ve missed Blair and Chuck. They really make the show. Serena’s okay but her outfits are a little slutty and she pulls this weird face when she’s trying to be all serious. And yeah for Hilary Duff! I totally loved Lizzie Maguire even though I was too old for it. But I couldn’t help it, the cartoon character was sooo cute. And I liked her platform sandals.

Christmas is around the corner. I am so excited to celebrate a Christmas in my own home. It’s definitely my favourite time of year. Everyone is happy and nice to each other. And I always get this warm, fuzzy feeling. I cannot wait to go shopping for the tree for the flat.

Finding the Cruel Intentions soundtrack when I thought I’d lost it. OMG, it is still as awesome as the first time I heard it.

Pringles…the salt ‘n’ vinegar flavour. Enough said.

Things That Bug Me

Grown-up mean girls. Seriously high school is over. Why do you have to say mean things to me to make you feel better. Can’t you just say it about a celebrity like the rest of us. You’re in your thirties so perhaps it’s time to grow up.

Not having the money to go shopping. An oldie but still a good one. I’m trying to save for Christmas presents so as a result, there are no new clothes or shoes this month.

My horoscope not making sense. Are good things on the way? I know it’s the person’s job to be cryptic but a little bit of a hint wouldn’t hurt.

Not having any more episodes of Glee. I need to know what happens next.

Creepy guys. Enough said.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Monday's Mantra

This week is all about having faith.
I believe a latte can improve a Monday.
I'm addicted to Gossip Girl Season 3.
I wish I could go shopping.
I'm jealous of anyone who gets to kiss Chuck Bass.
Soundtrack/Mantra for the Week Cos I gotta have faith, faith, faith!

It's Friday! I'm in Love (with lots of guys)!

Friday. As there ever been a better word said to a person who is continually bored at work and wasting away her talent. By talent, I mean being Queen of the World.

Whilst I've been answering phones, booking lunches I'm not invited to and organizing board meetings the world has been mismanaged.

One nice thing about my job, the internet. At the moment we have no restrictions which means I can listen to Youtube whilst I type out letters. I can read stress-management blogs while my desk neighbour irritates the crap out of me and I can browse gossip sites. For me, this is the reason the internet was invented.

And this week, I have fallen in love. If we were counting my celeb crush total and the number of times I have fallen in "love", I would be a virtual crush slut.

These are the hot men I have been salivating over this week:


Mark Ronson is an old favourite. I'm a huge fan of geek chic and I think he personifies it well. One of his little sister is a designer. The other dates Lindsay Lohan. If there was a burning building and he could only save one of his sisters, I know which one I'd vouch for. Luckily is family hasn't come between us yet.


Ed Westwick. Ah, Chuck Bass. I don't think I need to go on. But in case you still haven't been convinced, here he is at the Glamour magazine awards in London earlier than week. Tanned, stubbly and utterly jumpable.


The last thing I'm in love with is not a guy. More than two crushes a week is even enough for me. It's this fabulous primer from Mac. It's called Prep + Prime and retails for R250.00. I haven't bought my own yet. I'm saving my money for the big move. But I have tried it out and it's amazing. It makes your skin feel silky soft and foundation just glides on. No more blotchy patches.

To end this Friday off, here's one of my all-time favorite songs. It calls for singing horribly off-key at the top of your lungs.

Enjoy!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Wish List # 6 Chuck Bass

For those unfamiliar with Gossip Girl (aka one of the most awesome shows ever), then the allure and sheer-hotness of Chuck Bass, played by Ed Westwick, will be a mystery. Even I will admit that before I saw the show about Manhattan's elite teen-queens and heartthrobs I was so not a fan. Perez Hilton consistently mentioned the British actor and alluded to his supposed homosexuality with fellow GG co-star Chace Crawford. I was not a Chuck Bass convert until I managed to watch the whole first season. And I did so in two days, never leaving the couch with a consistent supply of junk food. The rest, I am now a bona-fide Chuck-a-holic!

This Upper East Side bad boy of Manhattan's social scene may not be the first choice to take home to the parents. But he is the one they would have warned us about. The notorious, manipulative and sexy Chuck Bass breaks all the rules and has such fun doing it. He makes no apologies except justifies his actions with his now-renowned catchphrase, "I'm Chuck Bass". Although revenge and self-gain are synonymous with his character, Chuck also managed to show us a softer, caring and loyal side when it comes to his bestie Nate and his love interest Blair.

Apart from the money and the womanising and his catchphrase, Chuck Bass is a natty dresser. And us women folk couldn't be more happier. We're watching the show for him as much as for Blair's headbands and Serena's ensembles. Chuck Bass has the ability to mix prep-school cool with street style. His eponymous patchwork scarf has had fashionistas scrambling to purchase one for themselves and has spawned its own dedicated fansite.

Until we get Chuck Bass, we'll settle for some pictures and quotes.

"I'm Chuck Bass


"There's something wrong with that level of perfection. It needs to be violated."


"Why don't I turn that one piece into a no-piece."


"Well I'm Chuck Bass."