Things I've Realised...

...making homemade ravioli is fun and can be easy. If you have a pasta machine. Chefs and foodies are not messing around when they say the dough needs to be crazy thin. We started with what seemed like the Kate Moss thinness of pasta but turns out we really needed the Nicole Richie circa Skeletor era of thinness. A pasta machine would have also been handy 'cause rolling out those shapes is a bitch. But once you're filling then up and boiling them, then adding heaps of pasta sauce and then sprinkling Parmesan on, you forget about all the other things.

...Precious is one hectic movie. There are lots of hand-over-mouth and eyes-closed moments but there are also some funny moments and inspirational moments.

...you never need a reason to google Henry Cavill. But because he's been chosen as the new Superman, people are not as judgmental.

...when you have a crappy day pizza, a romcom, your roomie and some chocolate can make it all better. I tried this yesterday and went to bed in a happy place.

Hope everyone has a fab week.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

An Open Letter To...

…the creators of chick-flicks. You have ruined my life. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy your movies immensely, I watch them all the time and thus have a horrible romantic life.

I waste so much time looking for guys with sparkly skin or secret royal lineages in the hope that I can be the one who makes a difference in their lives, you know be “the only thing that’s real” or at least get them to go outside and strip. Shiny things make me happy.

I am probably ignoring dozens of perfectly eligible men because I’m on the lookout for boys with posh British accents who are willing to partake in sad attempts of fighting for my honour. Never mind that these same guys will cheat on me with skinny-ass tanned women or that they prefer a little something-something from ladies of the night, Hugh Grant I’m talking to you, I’m hooked.

I dance my ass off at clubs because I have come to believe many hot guys are not only sensitive souls but can also bust a move and one day we’ll end up doing choreography in a street together.

I want to wait in the rain because I’ve learnt not only will I look radiant and my mascara won’t run but that guy, the one that got away will find me and we’ll have a moment and kiss and totally ignore the fact my shirt is see-through.

You have convinced me that a kiss is a gazillion times better when it’s accompanied by a killer soundtrack. Also running into each other’s arms makes for great dramatic moments. On a side-note, have you ever tried that? It’s hard to master and if you’re out of sync, teeth bash, foreheads bump and someone lands up on the floor.

I also fear that when I do find love without an elaborate gesture I may not believe it. If there is no guy with cue cards telling me I’m perfect or a John Cusack look-a-like holding up a classic 80s song on a boombox, how will I know if it’s real. If a guy is not willing to slay an evil sea witch or go to prison ‘cause some little bitch of a sister falsely accused him of something then I’m gonna eject his ass.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Image from here.

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Image from here.

This Week I...

…went to watch Grease at the Odeon Cinema.

Please note the very Sandy-esque outfit.

Skinny Bitches were very lucky to be invited to a very fabulous event this past week.

The Dealio: The Pepper Club Hotel in Cape Town hosts monthly-themed movie and dinner evenings. Guests are treated to dinner, wine tastings, drinks, tasty treats, prizes as well as a goodie bag. Not to mention getting to enjoy an awesome movie.

The Venue: The Pepper Club can be found in Loop Street, Cape Town. Think movie-style hotels. The kind where doormen greet you instead of wondering why you’re there. With all the pretty people drifting in and out of the lobby, I half expected Richard Gere to pop out somewhere and offer me some money to spend some time with me. It’s that classy a place! Also it has a very fabulous bar called the Paparazzi Bar which apart from great drinks, has huge containers filled with sweets, chocolates and chappies gum; drinks and sweets, my kinda place.

The Paparazzi Bar

The Theme: One of my guilty pleasures is dancing movies. Seriously no matter how awful the dialogue, I’m talking to you Step Up 3D, I can handle it as long as there are some awesome dance routines in the middle. So I was beyond words happy when I found out that we’d be watching Grease. Even better, the whole theme was centered around Summer Loving.

The Venue

The Event: The event started with some old-school soda pop, snacks and wine from Leopard Leap. We were then ushered into the cinema and settled in with some popcorn and coke floats.

Skinny Bitches rocking it

The movie started and I’m not gonna lie, I sang along. Halfway through though the movie stopped. Luckily it had nothing to do with my singing but more with the amazing food awaiting us. That’s right, even more food! And even better, there was a waffle station with enough toppings to put you into a diabetic coma. I may have made more than one venture over there :)

The Waffle Station aka Heaven

Once we’d eaten enough and made sure the rest of the weekend would be spent at the gym, we finished the rest of the movie. Afterwards we were all told to look under out seats because there were some awesome prizes laying around. I was lucky enough to have one prize which is a pole-dancing lesson! Stay tuned to the blog cos that will definitely be an interesting experience.

With our girls

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

For more deets about The Pepper Club, their Mid-Week Movies and bookings you can go to their website or Facebook page.

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

Michelle: What are you picking on us for any way? We are NOT the ones who got fat.
Christie: We're pregnant, you half-wit.
Michelle: Oh yeah? Well, I hope your babies look like monkeys!

Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion

Happy Friday Bitches!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!
Image from here.

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

"Look Heather left behind one of her Swatches. She'd want you to have it Veronica. She always said you couldn't accessorize for shit."

The Heathers

Image from here.

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

"I'm sexy, I'm cute, I'm popular to boot.
I'm bitching, great hair,the boys all love to stare.
I'm wanted, I'm hot, I'm everything you're not.
I'm pretty, I'm cool, I dominate this school.
Who am I? Just guess, guys wanna touch my chest.
I'm rocking, I smile and many think I'm vile.
I'm flying, I jump.
You can look but don't you hump.
I'm major, I roar, I swear I'm not a whore.
We cheer and we lead. We act like we're on speed.
Hate us 'cause we're beautiful, well we don't like you either.
We're cheerleaders.
We are cheerleaders.
Roll call..."

The Torros - Bring it On

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

Bernadette: What a lovely dog, what's its name?
Man: Herpes.
Man: If she's good, she'll heal.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

Karen: If you're from Africa, why are you white?
Gretchen: Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Image from here.

Classic Movie, Classic Quote

Tai: Why should I listen to you anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive.
Cher: That was way harsh Tai.

Happy Friday Bitches!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!