Something to Make You Giggle

Have you ever received an email or have been IMing with something and you read something so funny it makes you want to burst out loud with laughter. But because you're at work you can't really laugh loudly so you do that silent laugh where your body keels over and you start shaking 'cause you're trying to keep it all in and then your eyes start watering and then suddenly you're the weird girl who has convulsions at work?

Yes? No? Just me then?!

Anyway, I was informed of a blog that made me laugh in the above fashion. It's called Sleep Talking Man and it consists of a wife blogging about her husband's night time chattering. There is more to it but I didn't want to bore you with that. Instead check out my favourite snippets that he has said while asleep.

"You can't be a pirate if you don't have a beard. I said so. MY boat, MY rules."

"Your mum's at the door again. Bury me. Bury me deep."

"Don't... Don't put the noodles and the dumplings together in the boat. They'll fight! The noodles are bullies. Poor dumplings."

"I haven't put on weight. Your eyes are fat."

"Vegetarians will be the first to go. That's my plan. Vegans haven't got a hope. 'I eat air, I'm so healthy...' Bollocks!"

"I've got a really terrible terrible feeling about this custard tart. Terrible."

"I don't want to watch. I want to get my hands dirty, all the way up to my shoulder. Filthy."

"Since when did my underwear look good on you? Take it off. Take it off your face."

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!