Dear Future Boyfriend

I believe in soul-mates. I believe there is one perfect person out there for everyone. I believe that he is out there for me.

But just in case he's not, I have a back-up plan. I have written a series of blog posts for my future boyfriend to make sure he knows exactly what he is getting into. Am I not a considerate future girlfriend?! If I wasn't so batshit crazy, they'd be lining up at the door.

So if you're a guy and you're reading this, you might be one of three things:
A. A homosexual
B. A Perve who ended up here whilst googling "skinny bitches" and looking for dirrrty pics
C. A straight guy who clearly wants to find the one too. So for you here is what you need to know:


Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight
Part Nine 
Part Ten  
Part Eleven  
Part Twelve 
Part Thirteen 
Part Fourteen
Part Fifteen