My Olympic Highlights

Yes the Opening Ceremony was fabulous. Yes South Africa is doing well and yes these athletics are making us feel lazy and wondering "what were we doing at that age." But let's all take a moment to celebrate the best part of the Olympics: the boys. Especially the boys who spend their time in water.

First up, this is a local. Chad Le Clos, he won gold for swimming some race but more importantly his dad has won the world's hearts. He's 20, comes from Durban and cried when the national anthem was played during the medal ceremony. I want to have his babies. Mainly because I want his dad to scream "Unbelievable" when I give birth.

This is Ryan Lochte. He has also won gold. I cannot tell you what for. I can tell you he is cute. He also seems like a bit of a douche. Not intentionally but he reminds me of those guys who hang out at Tiger Tiger with white pointy shoes, ordering Jaggy Bombs and wanting to have sex in the bathroom. Know what I mean?! Not my type but if he looked at me, can't say I'd say no.

This is Nathan Adrian. He is half-Asian, which means our children will be 1/4 Asian. As I really want a fat Asian baby of my own, I will accept this. I have spent way more time researching him than necessary and I have found out I'm a year older than him, he wants to be a doctor and he has Twilight on his iPad. I just want to say 我愛你 which is I Love You in Chinese according to Google Translate.

This is Tom Daley. He has a tendency for making me feel old. Most of the time I find pictures of his legal and totally ah-mazing body. Other times when I'm doing my Daily Daley Google I find pictures of his last Olympics outing. When he was like 14. He is a diver and has been in the news because one sick mofo has been Twitter-trolling him. Personally, he should be in the news because of his abs.

This is Louis Smith. He's a gymnast. He does cray cray things on the pommel horse. I actually watched his final so I know what tricks he did. And let me tell you, the guy has stamina. My arms get tired from just straightening my hair, he manages a whole routine with his arms. From all the pictures I've seen he seems to have a bit of Gay Face but as you know I'm a Fag Hag so all are welcome in my arms.

 Anyone else I'm missing out on? Let me know.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Images from here, here, here, here and here.