So the last night I was “tricked” by my flatmate, fellow skinny bitch and all-round fabulous person to go salsa dancing.
Here’s the thing about me and partnered-up dancing; I cannot do it.
Seriously. I’m all awkward and I look at my feet too much and am so self-conscious, it’s not pretty to watch. Despite my foreboding that this was going to be the worst thing I’ve ever done, and I’m including the time I sang karaoke, I put on my favourite heels and a dress that would lift up when I did turns. I may be bad at choreography but I still have
Dirty Dancing fantasies. And off we went.
This is how I thought I'd look. Not even close in reality. We paid and settled in to watch the intermediate class before our beginner class. And that’s when I wanted to throw up. What we witnessed was dancing of professional skill and no one messed a step. I was assured that our class would be nothing to worry about. I nodded and started to look for emergency exits.
When we started, I admit the warm-up and basic steps were fun. I could do these. And at one point I actually managed to let go of my issues and swing my hips and look kinda like I knew what I was doing. Then we started to partner up. This is where shit got real. As I partnered with the various men (a goldmine if you’re looking for boys that can dance ladies) I realised they all had a similar problem. They were dancing with me. Some were very nice about me messing up the steps, one wasn’t. A couple were worse than me (thanks for small mercies) but then again the guy’s are doing all the hard work.
After what I consider torture, we all formed a line again and did our warm down. This was my chance to excel. And let me tell you Baby has nothing on me when it comes to turning and clapping my hands to the music.
One day. One day.
This experience has taught me many things:
1. I will may for my own humiliation.
2. Nothing can prepare you for a foreigner to shout “No!” when you get the steps wrong. Sorry dude! Didn’t realise I was in the way of your
Strictly Ballroom ambitions.
3. Bad dancing cannot be solved by my usual way out of awkies situations with boys; wearing a low-cut top and lots of eye makeup.
4. This could be where a lot of the cute men are hiding. And they can move or at least want to. Major points.
5. Having a good partner can make all the difference.
6. Salsa is great cardio.
7. I’ll probably never do this again :)
Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!
Images from here.
Whether it’s sipping mojitos with the girls at a trendy bar, dancing the night away with your gays or murdering Making Love Out of Nothing At All at a dodgy karaoke bar, your style should not be overlooked. Now if you were one of those clever peeps who entered this competition, you could be strutting away in a pair of nude concealed platforms. And if you visit 36Boutiques and whip out your credit card, you could be dropping the style like this. Get up offa that thing and dance till you feel better!
The fabulous coffee club met again. This time at Yours Truly in Long Street. There's something so weird about being in Long Street so early in the morning. There's no noise, there are no people pub crawling, all the neon lights professing Open! Bar! Shots! are switched off and there are no scantily-clad ladies. In fact there are no ladies even doing a walk of shame. Which I did expect. It was all sort of peaceful.
Yours Truly opened up in 2010 and you'd miss it if you weren't looking for it. There is a bench outside with loads of plants and even a hatch which I assumed is for take-aways but there were loads of creative types have a sit-down. Oh that's one thing I noticed it's full of well-dressed, hipster type peeps, girls in brogues and advertising boys with arm tattoos. So very interesting to people watch.
This is how I thought I'd look. Not even close in reality. 
One day. One day.
