An Open Letter...(Musical Addition)

To the people involved in the Fame remake. I absolutely loved the original. It was gritty, it was real and it still had dancing. Any movie with any type of dance sequence is automatically placed in my Top 100. I saw the trailer for the new version and felt a bit queasy. Were they going to take my beloved Bruno, Coco and Leroy and turn it into High School Musical. (Ps. I heart HSM. I just didn’t want Fame to become a carbon copy). Skinny Bitches went to see the movie last night and I can report back that we are okay with it. It wasn’t HSM but it wasn’t Fame either. Yeah for Debbie Allen. Yeah for Karen from Will & Grace. And a big yeah for the hot boys. Much needed. But what happened to the street dancing? Leg warmers and my absolute favourite part of the original, when the graduating class sing The Body Electric. Also you can lose the Jenny character. Can you say bugging. A good movie but missing some crucial bits. If remakes continue like this what is going to happen to my adored Footloose.

To the people who wrote You Can’t Stop The Beat. Thanks for making the happiest song ever. Yes it’s totally cheesy and I’ll never know all the words. But whenever I hear it I smile and have to dance. Kudos.

To the Hollywood executives. Please whatever other remakes you do, do not touch Sound of Music. For me there will be no other Maria, no other Captain Von Trapp and definitely no other Liezel and the Nazi in the gazebo. If you must and I mean absolutely must remake it, will you please keep the Lonely Goat Herd sequence. Everyone loves singing puppets.

To the Mamma Mia! peeps. I am still not happy about James Bond singing ABBA songs. But I have learnt to deal. I am unhappy about you guys leaving out The Name of the Game and Under Attack. And I do believe there were much more shirtless hotties in the stage production. Not sure if you can bring out a re-mastered version but see what you can do.

To Hans Christian Anderson. Thanks. If you hadn’t written the Little Mermaid and if Disney hadn’t stolen it, I would never have heard the song Kiss The Girl. I can still watch it now and suddenly am feeling like my younger self. Happy. In love with Prince Eric. And totally dreaming to become a mermaid when I grow up.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

A Few Of My Favourite Things

I'm a huge fan of musicals. Particularly The Sound of the Music. I have found that when I'm down, they make me happy. Not sure if it's the overly camp dancing, or lyrics or even the cheesy storyline. Things are enjoyed best when they are immortalised in song.

But that's not what this post is about. It's about the simple things in life. Those little, insignificant items or occurrences that make you smile without being part of the big picture.

Here is a list of my favourite little things:

Wearing my black wrap dress

There's just something fabulous about a dress that hugs all the right places and skims over the bad bits. It's versatile to wore to work and out for cocktails. And it's black which means it'll remain effortlessly chic and stylish. Plus I always dress it up with colourful shoes or a bright scarf.

Having a latte from Vida

At heart I'm a Seatte Coffee Co. girl but considering I work in an office park with not one, but two Vida e Cafes, I don't feel the need to be proud and righteous. Besides the I drink my coffee at Seattle is tres different to the way I drink it at Vida. I suppose what makes it even more fun is that on a boring work day, a single latte with one sweetner, makes all the difference. And taking the walk to the coffee shop is great exercise and a nice way to kill some time!

Hearing Blue Monday

My brothers and sisters grew up in the 80s. I was born in the late 80s. I may not have been there but I know all the songs. Which is way whenever I hear New Order's backing track, I instantly start singing "How does it feel to treat me like you do..." It's one killer song. So imagine my happiness when I turned on the radio on Monday and it was playing on 5fm. Good times.

Having an illicit packet of Salt 'n' Vinegar chips

I know S&V is not a flavour for everyone. These people (including Blue Eyes) are what I refer to as insane. The tangy the better. And do not even get me started on S&V popcorn. A movie is not complete with so much S&V flavouring until your popcorn has changed colour and you cough when you eat some. These delectable and mouth-puckering treats are best enjoyed when you're on a diet and need to take a break. Hence illicit. But as I have discovered, too much of these, won't only make your tongue numb, they'll make you wonder why you're on a diet in the first place.

Jim from The Office

I'm currently rewatching the american version and as much as my heart belongs to Tim, Jim is just so loveable. I'm not sure who I want to marry more. Considering they're both fictional characters, I don't have to make this decision just yet. Not sure if it's his pranks on Dwight, his love for Pam or just his Jim Face when he looks at the camera. But watching him makes my heart sing.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Wish List # 4 The Power To Turn Gay Men

Us, skinny bitches like gay men. A lot. We actually love them. Most of our best girlfriends are gay. Most of our male friends are gay. So there’s a lot of love in this relationship. And why wouldn’t there be. Gay men are faboosh! Whether they’re stereotypically loud and bitchy or sensitive and caring or even into sports and completely straight-acting. We love love love spending time with them. They’re the perfect men apart for one big thing: other men.

Gay men have dressed us, comforted us and laughed with us. All while doing so in designer labels and smelling better than we do. The relationship could only be improved by some action in the bedroom. So there’s no surprise that if we had a multitude of wishes, we’d definitely wish to turn those cute, charming well-dressed, well-gelled men into appreciators of the female species. And we don’t just mean appreciating our outfits. We want those men to do more than stroke our hair. We’d ultimately like them pulling it in the throes of passion. Instead of dressing us in fabulous ensembles we’d like them to rip our clothes off without caring about the stitching. After we watch the Dirty Dancing together, we’d want to get down and dirty. Maybe even dance too.

Alas this is one thing we know we’ll never get. Sure some of willing to experiment but ladies, these ladies are only focused on men. So we’ll settle for being their hags. The girls they call when they want to go out for a latte. They girls they don’t getting undressed in front of. The girls they tell have lost weight over the phone. The girls they create a fabulous beehive updo for. And the girls they watch The Sound of Music with. Gay men, still pretty perfect.

We may not be allowed to have them but we can still look at them.

Here are the top 5 guys we wish we weren’t gay:

Simon Amstell

Kyan Douglas

Tom Ford

Luke Macfarlane

Adam Lambert