Am I The Only One...

...who finds utterly annoying when coworkers come up to your desk, look at you and then knock on what seems to be an invisible door and then wait for you to say "Come in."

I wish I could cower behind said invisible door and pretend not to be in like I do when my mom's weird friends came to visit and she wasn't home.

What's even more annoying is when they ask after knocking "Anybody home?"

Jeez Louise.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

A Women's Right To Shoes

Isn’t it amazing that no matter how bad you are feeling, whether it be a bad hair day or a fat day, a little shopping does wonders for your self-esteem. Skinny Bitches hit the shops yesterday for some much-needed retail therapy. As our bank accounts do not reflect those as trust fund babies we were limited in what we could buy. Saying that, we still managed to get some fabulous stuff. Now the problem is, I’m really eager to go shopping again but I have to be a grownup about it.

Being a grownup means paying things like rent, utilities and credit card first. Then it’s the matter of putting your gym, groceries and petrol money aside. Then finally you’re left with what is a teeny tiny amount on which you’re meant to be a social butterfly and still look awesome in a new dress. Normally I’d forgo the new dress for going out more. I have a fabulous roomie who has a closet full of clothes I can borrow. And due to the fact I’m vertically challenged and she’s not, all her sexy tops can be worn as dresses. That means I have tripled the number of dresses at my disposal.

This month however I need to get some new shoes. I absolutely love the fact that a pair of shoes can make an outfit. I used to have really nice shoes. Now I sorta have nice shoes. You see I’m a firm believer in dressing up no matter the occasion (unless it’s the gym then I look fug). So everyday to work I wear something that takes more effort than pulling a pair of jeans and a the first t-shirt without stains on. And I always make an effort with my shoes. As a result my once pretty red stilettos, purple, pewter, navy blue, black, sparkly brown, baby pink, green, beige open toe, white, red peep-toe, red peep-toe with detail, black wedges, black pointy, black pointy with diamante, white with the ankle strap, black ankle boots, black knee-length boots, brown knee-length boots and black pointy with ankle ribbon ties are all damaged.

And I need new ones. Dilemma is, which ones do I get. I could get some new versions of the damaged kinds above but I feel I want to experiment. I’m loving the new-look gladiators. They aren’t as scary as the ones that came out a few years ago. And am also loving shoes with bits of details whether it be flowers or bows. Studs are also the hot thing right now. But I’m not sure I’m that kind of girl. More importantly I could never pull that off. I ventured to Net-A-Porter and found these beauties. Obviously there is no way I afford them but am hoping to find some local equivalents. What do you think?

Christian Louboutin

Rupert Sanderson

Valentino

Jimmy Choo

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Monday's Mantra*

This week I'm getting paid. Hurrah!
I believe payday is the best and worst day of the month.
I'm addicted to walking past the perfume shop so I can keep my Henry Cavill obsession going.
I wish Green Eyes would stop it with the denial, Henry Cavill is mine! (I wish Blue Eyes wasn't so delusional - Green Eyes).
I'm jealous of the woman who obviously has too much money because she can afford to ride a motorbike in Louboutins.
Soundtrack/Mantra for the week Total Eclipse of the Heart

* My new excuse for posting pictures of Henry Cavill (from JustJared)

I Want!

Look at these amazing ankle boots by Roberto Cavalli. And they're on sale at theOutnet.com.

That trust fund would come in handy right about now!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Feeling Bleh

I have absolutely no desire to do anything except check out my Facebook and eat cupcakes. Which means my blogging material is running low.

I blame the weekend. Actually make that the kick ass weekend. It was so much fun and that has been a big problem. You see last week was hectic work-wise. So all I could do was think about the weekend. Then it arrived and went in a blur of awesomeness. I want another one.

We started off the weekend by dressing like ladies and meeting the gang at Planet Bar. When I'm a proper grown up I am so totally going to spend a month's salary on a room at the Mount Nelson. On Saturday we went for spa treatments, which was more pain than pampering but any lady knows those waxes need to be done. Then it was time for some shopping. Saturday ended with a visit from the gays and dancing at Assembly (which is where all the hot guys have been hiding, why did no one tell me this). On Sunday, we all had brekkie and the mandatory visit to the parental units (more for the free lunch and "shopping" in the pantry). The evening was dedicated to cupcakes and Sex & The City.

Now I'm back at work and only the thought of the upcoming holiday is keeping me going. Wait that's actually a lie. There is one other thing. I was walking in Gardens Centre when suddenly I stopped at the fragrance shop. There in the window was a poster for what is now my new favourite obsession.



Henry Cavill for Dunhill. O.M.F.G I may need a napkin.

(If you want to feel happy all over, you can watch the advert for the fragrance as well here. Enjoy!)

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Monday's Mantra

This week I will be more organised.
I believe weekends are way too short.
I'm addicted to those damn prawn chips (again!).
I wish my life was an 80s brat pack movie.
I'm jealous of people with loads of cash to blow on nights out partying.
Soundtrack/Mantra for the week Just Can't Get Enough

It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want too

That's a bit melodramatic.

I had a really good day considering I was at work and am looking forward to the weekend plans.
Today I got woken up by my favourite roomie 'green eyes' with a cup of tea and a chocolate Charlie's cupcake....heaven...and a good way to start any day. Then I got to work and discovered condoms on my desk...apparently we all got them, but people decided to pass theirs along to me seeing as it is my birthday and I acquired more than one pack. I now feel as if my desk can pass for a family planning clinic. On the bright side, I'll alwyas be prepared.

Then I discovered a present hiding behind my laptop from the writer of Juz, Jax and El. It's a personalised blog message to me printed and framed, it even came with the Juz, Jax and El wrapping paper. I absolutely love it and am trying to decided whether to keep it at work or at the flat were I know it will make green eyes jealous...

I got lots of birthday wishes from friends and colleagues and hugs (which I love too) and even my Client gave me a gift which is really sweet, maybe they really do like me!

Then it was back to the office where we had cake (thanks mom) which went down a treat and I got the most amazing bunch of flowers from my bosses. Super spoilt.

Now, Im at the folks (mandatory family-birthday dinner) which again was great and I get to do sweet nothing as they run around fussing over me...lucky I brought a whole bag of washing home with me...

Plans for weekend are as follows: breakfast tomorrow with folks at wine farm, then best friend picking me up for 'adventure' (slightly nervous), the off to Planet Bar for cocktails tomorrow eve with close friends. Then saturday green eyes is taking me to spa to get me all pamapered up and spolit, then we're off to Assembly for some rocking 80's tunes.

Can a Skinny Bitch get any luckier?
Birthdays Rock

B.E

Happy Birthday Blue Eyes

It's Blue Eye's 24th birthday. Yay!
Hope you have an absolutely fabulous day and get spoiled!

Enjoy!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

I'm Not Being A Bitch, I'm Just Honest

Helen from Bonding Over Lizards tagged Skinny Bitches with the Honest Scrap award. We heart awards. Thanks! And definitely go and check out her blog, it’s faboosh and every now and again she posts videos of awesome 90s songs. So here are my 10 honest things:

I’m afraid watching Private Practice has made me broody.

I really don’t like when people try and talk to me in lifts. I can be friendly and charming and funny but I select not to. Mostly I’m afraid I might use up some of my best material on people I’ll never see again.

I think one of the worst things a friend can make you do is join him/her and his/her significant other while they are still in the loved-up stages. Imagine watching a movie with a couple who are making out the entire time. Then imagine trying to talk about the movie afterwards and instead of answers getting giggles and sheepish smiles and them saying “Guess we missed that part.” Oh yes it’s happened.

For every straight guy I know, I know two gay ones. This has me worried.

I absolutely hate the phrase “Good value for your money” and I want to stab myself with a blunt spoon when I hear someone say it.

Nothing makes my heart more sore than saying no to people begging at robots, particularly when they are disabled or children.

The ultimate dealbreaker for me is someone pinching something off my plate without my permission. If you want some, ask, I will give it to you purely because you did not bug me and asked. If I’m having those prawn chips from Woolworths or sour worms you may not be so lucky but you never know.

If I ever had plastic surgery, I’d want to look like Rachel McAdams.

I’ve used the “I’m not a bitch. I’m just being honest” line numerous times and honestly, I was just being a bitch ;)

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

An Open Letter...

To all the people who complained to me today. All 100 million of you, please stop it. I listen everyday and every day I try and help but for just one day please stop. I cannot take it anymore. And I’ve actually stopped caring that these are not 100% perfect. Because I know even if they were, you would still find something to complain about. So in the words of Madonna, I’m not your bitch, don’t hang your shit on me.

To the person who judged my salad with feta. Yes I know there was more feta than actually green things. Yes I know it’s not the low fat one. And yes I know that it cannot be good for me. But isn’t it enough I had a salad and not just slabs of feta on its own. Without being disgusting, I could eat feta just like that. It’s that good. So maybe concentrate on your own lunch rather than mine. And don’t you know Feta Makes it Better!

To the hot guy driving next to me on De Waal drive, just name it and I’ll do it. Sounds crass but trust me he would be worth it.

To my friend at the MAC counter, thank you. Liquid eye liner has changed my life. And I finally got to wear my green eyeshadow. I don’t care if it’s a bit too much for work. It makes my eyes more prominent and I love it.

To the people who invade my personal space, what is so important you need to be up in my business. I try to be polite but I will never tell you it’s bothering me. So I move away and yet you move closer. We look like we’re doing a retarded type of dance. Other times I cannot be bothered to move away and in turn I become bitchy to counteract your proximity. I do not want to be a bitch and I am also not inviting you into my area. That is reserved for my hot water bottle and Robert Pattinson. And if I wanted you in that area, you would know it. Because I turn into a silly little girl and play with my hair and make “ooohh” noises. Plus I lean forward a lot so you can see “the girls”. Until I’m acting like a hussy, keep your distance.

Monday's Mantra

This week is going to be fabulous.
I believe I will be 24 years old this week.
I'm addicted to all things sweet and it's starting to show.
I wish it was raining and I was snuggled up in bed with a good book.
I'm jealous of Lauren from The Hills. She has my life!
Soundtrack/Mantra for the week Oh Happy Day!

10 Random Things About Me

Skinny Bitches were tagged by the lovely Being Brazen to do this post. Because I am very random, I have lots of random things to write about (myself).

At one point in my life, I want to be single, have an amazing job, an amazing house and not give a damn about anyone else’s happiness but my own.

Sometimes an episode of Sex & The City solves everything.

I get more scared when I go for my brow waxing than I do when I go for my lady waxing.

I cry every time I watch Armageddon without fail.

Whenever I see a movie with Scarlett Johannson I get really mad for some reason. She really bugs me.

I’m not a huge fan of children, I can only handle two at a time but I have my children’s names picked out. I’d have a boy and a girl and call them Connor and Boleyn.

I hate hearing magazine people tell me working in the industry is nothing like The Devil Wears Prada. As if I’m only in it for the glamour. Secretly I hope there is still a bit of glamour though.

Thanks to my gay bestie, I know the dance routines to most of Britney Spears songs. I do a mean Oops! I Did It Again.

I really want to plan a wedding. Even if it's not my own.

One of my biggest weaknesses is time wastage. I'm always late and I can waste hours doing nothing important, like for instance, worrying over my split ends or which one of my calves is bigger.

Ex-Oh! EX-Oh!

Win A Balmain Jacket!

Why should Rihanna and Anna Dello Russo have all the fun. Now you can also dress up in Balmain. theOutnet.com is having a fabulous giveaway where you can win this amazing designer jacket.



Go here to enter. The competition ends on the 14th of September and only one entry per person.

Good luck!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Seriously.

Last Night At The Movies:

Green Eyes waiting for popcorn so I can cover it with salt 'n' vinegar spice.

Boy 1: I'm going to a themed 21st.
Boy 2: What's the theme?
Boy 1: Infamous. I'm not sure who to go as.
Boy 2: There's always Hitler.

Green Eyes makes Jim Face.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Dont Cha

Don’t you just hate when someone is a heavy smoker and they invade your personal space. I don’t mind smoking. I’ve even smoked. You know those drunken club nights when suddenly for some unknown reason you need a ciggie. I blame Jaeger. Particularly for making me think that I look with one in hand. For this reason I don’t want to preach about it. Each to their own and all that nonsense but please if you are gonna talk to me about it, have a mint or at least rinse out your mouth with some water. And do not forget the hands. They are tres important. It will also stop me from trying to move away slowly. It looks like I’ve got a facial tick.

Don’t you just wish life could be a musical. Or at the very least people won’t frown on you for bursting into an impromptu song and dance when you’re shopping. Sometimes the vegetable aisle of a shopping market makes the perfect stage for a version of You Can’t Stop The Beat. I think this would also be a great idea when you want to tell someone how you really feel. No one can get mad when you sing them a song accompanied by jazz hands. When you have an overbearing parent a couple of verses of Papa Don’t Preach will do wonders. When you’re happy and want to tell the world you should be able to do so with Walking on Sunshine. And what boy would say no to This Girl’s In Love With You. It’ll be magic.

Don’t you just want to be French sometimes. They get to commit crimes of passion. They get to wear red lipstick and scarves in cool fashions. They get to have short Audrey Hepburn haircuts. And they never get fat. Okay I don’t think I’d ever have the energy or motive to commit a crime of passion but I’d like to know that if a boy treated me really badly and I accidently killed him, it’d be okay. I also cannot wear red lipstick, it’s my skin tone, so it would be nice to break some rules. And never getting fat. Like I need to justify that one.

Don’t you just want to have a career where your strengths are celebrated. Seriously I want a career where I can do what I love and get paid for it. And I don’t mean sitting on my couch watching Will & Grace and eating. For instance I love writing and would love to be a writer. At the same time I love pop culture references. Like really. I know my shizz. I kick ass at pub quizzes. You’d be lucky to have me on your team. Now if only I could get paid for knowing that much useless trivia. If this were a musical I’d look longingly into the distance and start singing All you have to do is dream, dream, dream, dream…

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Things That I ♥ and Things That Bug Me

Things That I ♥:

I love dramatic makeup. I love smokey eyes even more. Unfortunately I have the sort of eyelids that cause my eyeliner to smudge and the eyeshadow to disappear into the crease. Very disappointing when I’m working a full day and want to show off my smokey purple look. Now I don’t have to worry about it. I recently purchased MAC’s Liquid Eye Liner in Boot Black and I have fallen in love. I can do thick or thin lines and neither smudge or rub off. I can even do winged tips and get them right on the first time. No more cotton buds and makeup remover for me.

Buying new underwear. I know I shouldn’t be spending unnecessary money. I should be trying to save for a fabulous holiday next year but sometimes I cannot resist. And considering that I went through the whole of the recent sale season without buying a thing, I need to charge me some happiness. Luckily I was still able to enjoy the last dregs of some sales. I went to one of those fancy shops in the Waterfront’s Millionaire Mile. Something I have not been able to do in a while due to my lack of funding. Halfway through the month I may not be able to go out but at least my knickers will look good.

The rainy weather. Gives me an excuse to wear a fabulous black knit over a LBD with some black boots (with eye liner of course). And also means I can have hot chocolate tonight with a marshmallow and not feel guilty. I mean, look at the weather. It’s hot chocolate weather.

Things That Bug Me:

Why does it seem like every second girl in Cape Town has a blunt fringe and bangs? And these are also the girls were think that wearing tights as pants is acceptable. It. Is. Not. Tights are not pants not matter how bitchin’ they look. And I’m serious on the last part, wet look tights are to die for. If you can afford the chopped layers and fringe lop surely you can afford a longer top to cover your tights ass seam. Or maybe a skirt. Better yet get some skinny jeans and they will have the same effect. And they will actually be pants.

Skinny Bitches watch a lot of TV. We’re those types of girls. We cannot afford satellite and our parents are being evil and will not buy it for us either. So we decided the next best thing was signing up for PushPlay. I think it’s the equivalent of the Netflix except you get them delivered to your home or office. Now PushPlay have this fabulous free week trial where you can have, at any time, three DVDs in your possession. Sounds awesome. Except we have signed up looking forward to watch some rom-coms over the weekend and nothing has arrived. What a let-down. In case anyone who works there is reading this, we will still use your service, mostly because your range of TV series is unrivaled. But please, be a love and send us some DVDs.

The rainy weather may be nice for my outfit of the day but it also makes my hair frizz. Also I want to stop wearing scarves and remembering to carry my umbrella. I want to see the sun and be warm and get a tan. And I want to buy fabulous pairs of gold and silver sandals.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

Monday's Mantra

This week things can only get better.
I believe a latte can solve almost everything.
I'm addicted to carbs which is v bad.
I wish I had the energy to go to gym.
I'm jealous of no one, except my usual feelings for skinny, pretty & wealthy people.
Soundtrack/Mantra for the week It Won't Be Long*
*Just noticed there are an overload of Beatles songs on the blog. I watched Across The Universe for the gazillion time and am on a Beatles binge.

It's Driving Me Mad, It's Driving Me Mad*

*The title of this post comes from a Beatles song called I Want You. I thought it was an appropriate reference considering the nature of this post.

I really need to stop browsing Net-a-Porter. All it does is make me sad that I cannot afford the clothes.

Here are the latest pieces I am crying over:

This DKNY wrap dress is amazing. The crossover in the front would hide the aftermaths of not going to the gym. I’m thinking some gold bracelets or a chunky gold necklace would help.

I love love love this skirt from Steven Alan. I want to forgo the next few months food budget so I can buy it. Yes it’s simple but the shape is for me, the perfect skirt. I want to tuck in a white shirt and bold blue belt or wear a feminine blouse and rock some fierce heels with it. I want it so bad.

This is a strapless taffeta dress from Donna Karan. Can you say cocktail party.

Corsets are going to be huge this summer or says my new issue of Cosmo. I like that this Bottega Veneta dress is sexy on top but is knee length. So this dusty lavender number will provide you with some mystery when you’re out on the town.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

This Was Not The Way I Planned...

I love men. A lot. I love looking at them. I love talking to them and most of all I like doing other stuff with them. Saying that I have to admit I have a huge girl crush.

One of my favourite blogs is Style Guide Cape Town run by the fabulous Robyn Cooke. Profession, Stylist. Given my love for all these beautiful particularly fashion, if I was that way inclined, I would be hanging outside her window with a boombox playing a cheesy 80s love song.

Apart from my love for her blog and her fashion-related tweets, I also have a goal to be photographed by the fabulous Ms Cooke. Her blog is the Cape Town version of The Sartorialist without the pictures of Anna Dello Russo, who bugs me for some reason. It is because of her blog and also Glamour’s Do and Don’ts that I make a huge effort whenever I leave the house. It is a very superficial dream but one day I hope to appear on her blog with her gushing over my outfit.

This past Tuesday was when it almost happened. Myself, Dexter and the Social Butterfly descended upon Woolworths Cavendish for a preview of the summer fashions. Travelling with two coiffed, well-dressed, nice-smelling gays is the one way to do it. The Best of Summer Preview was hosted By Ms Cooke and someone from Egoli, my mom would have been so mad I didn’t get a picture with her. Towards the end of the evening (white dresses, hats and feminine blouses are going to be all the rage, orange too) I had an opportunity to have an audience with my girl crush. Unfortunately she turned the other way and the moment was gone. That was when Dexter pushed me towards her and by chance she turned around and commented on my dress*. I almost fainted. Unfortunately she didn’t have a camera with her but I still gushed about my love for her. She didn’t seem scared which was a good thing. Nothing kills a party like security throwing you out. She also invited me to be her stalker. What an honour! I can see it now, she is taking pictures of stylish people, I am taking pictures of her from the bushes.

I know I sound like a crazy person. But that is only because I am. Crazy in love :)

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

*I was rocking a blue Marion and Linde jersey dress with chocolate brown boots, neutral makeup and glossy lips.

Happy (Rainy) Spring Day

Stolen from Juz's blog post A Toast to Spring Day in Cape Town:

For more drinking-related cartoons (are there any better ones?!) visit Juz, Jax & El.

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!

The Best Kind of Hanging Out

On her blog yesterday, Helen said that sometimes sitting in your car with a bestie eating burgers in a parking lot can be the best kind of hanging out.

I agree whole-heartedly.

That was until last night. When I realised it is now a close second. For me, the best kind of hanging out is sitting in your pajamas, eating pizza loaded with feta and watching Mean Girls. It was so fetch!

Ex-Oh! Ex-Oh!